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Further Apart

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ArtsyAmbassadorArt

Published: Jul 13, 2015

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Literature Text

Our love was perfect

But now we're drifting

Further apart. I tried

Being fair, being honest,

Above all earnest and

Genuine, yet in the

End it wasn't enough?

My dear what happened?
Our ties were seamless
But now they're tangled,
Torn asunder, split apart.
I can't have you
Yet I want to.
Our journey ends here.

When we parted ways,

Our fates were unclear

And guided us astray.

Will our hands greet,

Eyes meet, again someday?

It cannot be certain
From this far away.

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astray drifting further love poem relationship romance sorrow torn apart breakup concretepoetry separation

This is my very first attempt on writing Concrete Poetry, and I'd really, really like comments and critiques on this. In addition to the time spent crafting the words, I took 1-2 hours to get the structure right. Clear to say, I'm still new at this and am looking for advice.

This is a simple but moving love piece in which each line is 4 words but the front and back two become increasingly spaced apart as the poem continues and explains the ever-dividing love of the two depicted characters here. The man's perspective is normal font, while the woman's is italicized. Their love and desire for each other is diminishing for some reasons or another, and the chances of getting back together are lessening over time. The form of this poem exemplifies this subject.

EDIT 8/2/2015: The Contrast Poem of this has been done! Closer Together

Comments23

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Music-Lover-Izzy

Jun 24, 2022

I love this! thanks for sharing!

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